Saturday, 29 February 2020

awww bugger y'all

I was all set to go to San Fransisco on the 13th March to attend GDC and meet up with lots of old friends and new contacts. It was going to be a good experience and I was buzzing.

but its been "postponed" though in truth that means cancelled, meh, I guess its a sensible move, the Corona virus is currently high on everyones fear list and thats caused a lot of the main exhibitors to pull out, so we have to wait till the danger passes and see what happens.

I really was looking forward to it, so many old friends lined up, but its understandable..,...disappointing, but understandable.


Ahthankyew

Wednesday, 26 February 2020

memories

I was doing what you're supposed to do when you keep blogs/diaries and looking back on some of my earlier posts, trying to remember some specific dates for things, but falling into a rabbit hole of memories.

Its interesting how things change you, make you angry or happy or sad at the time, and you look back with a certain degree of meh...

Not for everything though, I still feel an bit of inner rage at the way some people have treated me, also a sense of wtf was I thinking on others and the loss of some lovley people through death or neglect...but over time, even the biggest heartaches and cock ups just become memories, and today I need to focus on the fact I'm turning into a fat grumpy old man.

Probably won't be a problem in 4 years from now though.

Ahthankyew

Friday, 21 February 2020

finally got this worked out, well no, not really!!

Really just posting this here so I can link it to my forums, but this is an interesting thing. Its a model I downloaded from Turbo squid with the full intention of including it as a usable model in my book examples.

Sadly I just wasn't able to get it to render properly at the time and instead I used a simpler model of a lamborghini, which is a shame.
I recently went back to it though and tinkered about a bit and managed to get it to render.

Though not quite perfect yet, I have not done any normal or bump mapping on it, but thats something I will play with, also the transparency has been hard coded into it, isolating the canopy section and rendering it with a blue tinge....still its a good step forward, and will serve as a good example for a short lesson in how to do transparency in rendering...when I get it finished.

This week is carnival week, so I'm about to have a well earned rest (didnt you just have christmas...yes,, and I need a rest again), and finally putting in the last 40 hours needed for the colecovision project, it has to go.

I really do like this model though, its a shame it didn't go in the book, its very Batman like, might be quite cool if I made it black and matt



Ahthankyew

Saturday, 1 February 2020

No longer a European.

Well brexit happened, the single most stupid, pointless, wasteful,idiotic, misguided and unneccessery piece of political bullshit on record.

Of course today I woke up nothing has changed, apart from the fact the letter I got from the Dutch government making it clear that at some point I will need to apply for a residency permit, which, though unlikely, could be refused. The sun rose (kinda) and the day continued. It will continue, for me, but I'll have to watch the UK slowly sink into degredation and waste as it refuses to accept that its just jumped off a political and economic cliff.

I can't honestly express in words, other than a page full of swear words and rants at the stupidity of people who embraced this, how angry and despairing this nonsense makes me.

I have been hoping that sense would prevail or that some kind offer from the Dutch government to give us citizenship would happen. It hasn't.  I've been explaining to people for 3 years why all their reasons are false, lies, or outright ignorance, the lure of blue passports and no more nameless beaurocracts was just too strong. I give up.

The UK will be crowing for about 6 months until 1 by 1 the benefits they enjoy suddenly are no longer there, and the twats who engineered this mess will find it harder and harder to blame the EU for their incompetance (or will they, who knows, I'm overestimating the voters intelligence I suspect). As prices rise and choices fall, and there's no one left to blame, will they finally see sense and get rid of these chancers? Probably not, the reality is Brexit has exposed the utter gullability of people to believe any old bullshit papers and TV serve them and defend it with not one single thought about the harm they will do themselves.

I'd like to think one good thing is that Farage and his delinquent cronies are now out of a job, but fuckwits like them will be cashing in on this for years to come..I really hope, that in 20,30,40 years or so when this mistake is finally rectified, that they are still around to be fully punished for their misanthropy.

I can't really take it though, I refuse to be a second class citizen here, so even though I have been saying this for years, but kept putting it off. This year, I will apply for full Dutch citizenship, and in the process re-instate my full dutch name, Van Den Beuken... I'm done with petty UK mentality, it gives me nothing to be proud of.





Ahthankyew