Saturday, 22 January 2011

zombie no more

As part of my treatment for depression brought on from my cancer treatments, I've been taking oxazepam, the pills he gave me to sleep. They're pretty standard tranqs and calm you down when you have feelings of heightened anxiety or stress, which depression tends to magnify ( a lot!!!).

At the doctors suggestion I've been taking more of them the last few days as I was feeling said heighted feelings of anxiety and stress recently over the mail opening issues, which deeply affected me.
But no more. I've been a total zombie unable to do much more than shuffle around or sleep were I fall. I'll have to deal with anxiety and stress issues some other way.

In actual fact I'm not feeling quite so stresed about that now, could be residual oxazepam in my system, or just time calming me down. I HATE being doped up and this is exactly how the oxazepam makes you feel after 2 or 3 pills. Going to walk to the shop for some milk and then having several strong coffee's to clear my head.

I am really hating this whole depression thing, its a roller coaster ride with more downs than ups.


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